Well. We've twiddled our thumbs and done the crossword, but there ain't much in the way of yer actual festival news this morning (although NME are very excitingly doing a Knebworth '96 commemorative issue next week which was the first gig we ever went to, so we're looking forward to that). So, we turned to the entries for the Leeds ticket and clothing competition and got our kicks that way. You weirdos. Here's our first favourite, a stream of consciousness ramble of epic proportions.

"Well I’m from South Africa and a couple of my mates went to a fest called woodstock not WOODSTOCK but woodstock where really good bands would be together over three days and play non-stop. That was great but when it came to sleeping arrangements it sucked.

"The first night there, me and mate had nowhere to sleep so we ended up stealing some dude’s tent and running away with it over our heads and when we had to return it, the camp we took it from was no longer there. No worries, we just threw it down behind a mini van and it got ridden over and addition to that we were all around our camp fire having some beers and some dude just walks into the camp and gets into our tent so mate was like” WTF who the f**k was that?”

"Not knowing who it was my mate walked into the tent with a pole and smacked the dude over the head untill he woke up and was like “Dude, who are you?” Then he got up, stood at our fire like he knew us and eventually when he came round from his intense head beating he looked at us like what the f**k are we doing there and then he just fell over passed out and was gone in the morning and then the next day we accidently set our camp on fire and we had to flee.”

It's the nonchalanat setting the camp on fire that I love. Darren Small everyone.